Sunday, May 18, 2008

Twice recently; growing pains, changing relationships and identity crises have come up in casual communications. And this morning, while getting in some quiet reading, I stumbled upon an interesting topic; individuals versus groups. (Funny when that happens, yes? Hence, my theory on the wisdom behind horoscopes and fortune cookies...sorry I digress.)

I am the quasi-eccentric. My whole existence is a hodgepodge of ideologies many of which conflict with general populous. I think as I age it just gets more complex. The diminished need for acceptance has brought upon a plethora of interesting opportunities for growth and self exploration. As much as I enjoy the awareness of my metamorphosis, like others I too feel the burn of growing pains and separation. Almost subconsciously I have been purchasing vintage toys, as if trying to preserve parts of a life I once knew. Even more interesting that I opted for things and, not reaching out to friends and relatives that knew me when.

I'm in an interesting place on my path these days, with my children getting older and becoming more autonomous I suddenly have a lot more "Tea-time", time to just take it all in. I'm realizing more and more-as I've learned to truly taste this life and savor it, the flavors of people and places and things that I find over bearing and/or unnecessary. Much like food, I find company- when rich and flavorful can be satisfying in much smaller amounts, and better for your overall health! Laughs.

This all comes at a time when theologians are worried about 2012, ecologists are worried about global warming, economists are stockpiling fuel and food and, politicians are once again speaking of change. Change isn't something that just happens. It isn't this jolt that we've come to make it out to be. Instead, it is a slow process-like digestion. It's elusively taking place before the meal is placed before you and long after you've tipped your server and went on your way-and, not just on your hips. If it all came to a halt tomorrow, I can honestly say that I've tasted this life. Would I like to ginger the palate and try a few more flavors? I wouldn't mind-but I'm certainly not going to be greedy.

In other news, I'm almost done with my mixed media collage which has been a creative obstacles laden journey. I think it was a forced project-it definitely screams of hemispheric'll see. Winks. But my next challenge I'm looking forward to. I'll be upgrading The Buzzy Bee (pictured above right). I actually owned this same toy (not this one, in particular) as a child and since bees, and honey are still symbolically a big part of who I am, I've decided to rework this baby to more closely match the changes I've made in the years since I played with her. I'll start with an outdoor photo shoot and slowly begin her rebirthing. If I'm not captured and institutionalized photographing a pull toy in the green belt tomorrow, I'll post pics. Laughs.


BlossomingTree said...

A very enlightening post. It's nice to read blogs and get to "know" others a bit more.

BabyLyons said...

I can't wait to see what you do with the bee!

Beat Black said...

so beautifully written, I like the way you describe change

rachel said...

hi there, I just wanted to say thank you for your comment on my blog, so kind! I really appreciate hearing that someone enjoys reading what I write :) Take care!

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