Wednesday, January 23, 2008

The Moment of Truth, did you watch it? I probably would have passed it up had it not been for its place on the boob tube roster. The segue from American Idol was ever so subtle. One minute I'm thinking poor guy wasn't so bad and the next thing you know I'm sucked in. I will probably not watch it again, but it was rather interesting.
I've been dealing with some issues of deception and betrayal lately and while I am far from self-righteous I have a newly heightened sense of self and my own integrity based on some of the situations I've observed, and even been intricately involved. Of course that is simply because all lies are intricate.
Secrets feed lies and truth feeds character ~Tameka
Perhaps, I'll make in into a book or an email signature posthumously. Smiles.
Human beings begin their catapult into language development at the average age of 2, subsequently (provided they have regular social interaction, I.e. not orphaned, etc.) they will begin to make the correlation between words and emotional reactions somewhere between 4-6 and in there, between 5-7 we learn to manipulate situations to steer them in our favor by, of course-the use of language. That in mind, by adulthood you've had more practice lying than anything else! And boy do we get a great deal of practice!
So, I'm watching this show, Moment of Truth and I'm thinking how hard can it be? I even go as far as to phone a girlfriend and say,"Yeah, so what I have this opinion about X,Y,Z I'm entitled perhaps it'll send me to hell, surely it won't be the only thing". Just then, the questions start to get more personal. I have to now rethink my stance. I know without a shadow of doubt that secrets feed lies and, lies like the elephant in the room will grow until the walls come down. Now as a self proclaimed control freak, any secrets that I tell and have told are strategically devised as not to relinquish power. In short, nothing detrimental to my personal well-being has ever left my lips no matter how many glasses of alcohol have touched said lips.Pauses to pour a glass of Pinot Grigio and comment on Jordan's musical selection.
Basically, I cannot and will not be black-mailed...nope, I am all too abreast of the power of truth. That's right, it isn't the lie that holds the power but the truth, which getting back to the show is the reason the producers are willing to pay $500,000 for just telling the truth.
Now, don't mistake talking too damn much for honesty. In all relationships some things are simply better left unsaid, this is friends, family members, acquaintances, both personal and professional. You know like telling a new parent that their baby is ugly, just in bad taste all around, but more importantly don't share this with anyone who might use it against you in a huff.
Okay, I'm all over the place tonight, basically what I was piecing together in the shower is, the why. Why do we lie? It seems like a simple question, but trust that even upon asking myself in the mirror, I was tempted to put together some semblance of a palatable albeit not totally honest response. During the course of the show, the host asks the contestant if he thinks he is better looking than all of his friends. Seems simple enough, but is it? The true answer to that one question holds the power to make or break friendships and impressions. If you don't feel as attractive as your peers, would you admit your poor self image around them? Do you then have to worry that it will be used against you? Everyone has a predatory relationship. Yes, everyone has that one person who waits for their opportunity to build a chasm of a crack in your ego. Can't think of one, then chances you are the person. Now on the other side of the coin, if you say you are the most attractive (as the contestant did) chances are you risk the same fate, only your heightened self-worth will bring greater contempt. I compare it to misjudging the height/ weight of an object. You see a large boulder, upon preparing to lift it, your brain sends the signal to the glands, "Release the adrenaline and testosterone needed for this arduous task". You position yourself and apply strength, well, same thing happens mentally. The predator is still coming for you, only with the big guns now.
Human beings are obligate social creatures, just as carnivores will eat their young for survival of the species, herbivores will climb the highest tree and we will stoop to the lowest low to protect our ego, the food of social acceptance. It kind of makes you wonder, doesn't it? Tell the truth, you're combing your grey matter for your last untruth and dissecting it right now, know you are not alone. Good night.
I accept and even answer comments...go on, don't be shy...and don't be fresh either-the pen, rather the keyboard in this case-is mightier than the sword. Holds up finger and blows on it.

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