Wednesday, June 4, 2008

A Conversation with Grandma

My grandma is too cute. She is probably to blame for my tempestuous ways, as she validates everything I do but, that's okay! Really, of all the things I have discussed in therapy-that is not one of them. Anyway, today we were discussing my sewing venture. You could so hear the guilt as it wallow in the back of her throat. See, I was part of her social experiment in intellect and feminism. And, while she'll never accept the blame, again it is all hers. I left home not knowing how to cook, clean, sew, make a bed-you name it. If you'd have tested me on the table of elements, anatomy, or other academia, I'd be all over it. Ask me to bake a...well something you eat-not so much.

So today, I call her and after about 60 minutes of our usual gossip and all around family slander, we segue into my sewing and she says-as her voice drops several octaves, "How are you making out with a near whisper, sewing machine". I diplomatically respond, "Well, I'm not rushing into things, I'm just focusing on becoming comfortable with the machine itself before I start spending money on fabric and stuff." To which she replies, "Well that's right honey, you know what to do. Take your time and budget your money." This is grandma for, "My poor baby is inept." Her voice only drops when I talk about homosexuality, anarchy, vegetarianism, driving and well now-sewing. Yes, sewing to a Southern grandma or, my inability to do so is up there with the other cardinal sins. Let's just be grateful that she doesn't know that I've been sequestored to the 7th level of hell due to my violent tendencies. I'm sort of convinced that I'll be in the the 12th Reich by the time I actually complete a project on this machine, but y'know grandma is old and we don't want to worry her much. Clambers back over to the machine.


Kiandra said...

aww...hang in there. when i first started on my sewing machine (well my mother's old rusty singer) i couldn't sew a straight line...literally. my suegra (mil) came to the rescue and did the whole straight stitch for me. sigh. i put that darn machine away and just knew i was threw.

than a few years past, i got it back out, had a bit more patience and i was doing the damn thing. about a month later i made the hubby get me a good machine. and that is when my wings begined to grow...but when i upgraded the last time...girl i flew.

i truly believe that you can learn on any machine, with a little time and patience...but once you get into it and it becomes your "thing" the big dog machines really do help out.

as for the book...i swear i love it to death!! and i love house on mango street...i'll have to look up the other you mentioned ( it sounds familiar). we should start a book club...

i must of caught your vibes because i think i may have worked out my quilting dilemma last night/this morning...we'll see.

i need to seriously help you on the sewing front though...did you get my email reply to the one you sent?

maybe we can im soon...and i can help a sista out!


Kiandra said...

by the way..i talk to my grandma for hours too!

High Desert Diva said...

Heh, heh, heh...loved this post. It all sounds sooooo familiar!

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