Saturday, November 24, 2007

I've got one of those dull headaches that exist for no reason other than to annoy. I'm not going to let it defeat me though, for I've got Alka Seltzer and English muffins. Well, no there is no scientific proof that English Muffins cure headaches, but they're tasty and tasty alleviates some of the annoyance of having the headache in the first place.
Kathie has prescribed another anti-depressant, which is probably why I have a headache. I can't help but feel like the period of misery that precludes the jumpstart of antidepressants is some perverse medical version of, "I'll give you something to cry for." Why do people say that? Pauses in deep though which is soon interrupted by a whining child. Ugh, Yael wants to go back to Madison's house.
As an introvert, I find my extremely outgoing, social children to be quite disturbing...interesting and endearing-but thoroughly confusing. My daughter has had 2 sleepovers in 2 days. In addition, she has played with this person and others between the 2 sleepovers. Yet, she is not tired. I love my committee dearly, but after a good day, I must (for the love of all things sacred) have 2 face free, quiet, solitudinous good days to recharge. Jordan is a little more reserved than Yael-I've noticed him retreating mentally when one particularly loquacious friend is here too long. He can be very Joe-like in social settings. He'll sit seemingly interested in the random rantings of his peers. Where I would be on the verge of tears or worse just rise and retreat to my room. (Two of my girlfriends still talk about a time I got up during a night of drinking and gabbing and left them sitting in my living room-they later found my clothing atop the hamper and my bedroom door closed. The husband let them out.) Laughs.
We have an outing planned for's more pleasurable business than pleasure for pleasure's sake. But, there will be people...I'm guessing enough of them that Joe and I will not have to really engage any particular grouping. We can skirt the place and remain incognito. Laughs. We should bode well, I've spent the day alone in the dark, cleaned the litter box, watched a French Film cuddled with the kitties, took a shower, took my headscarf off for about 5 minutes which was about how long it took me to decide against combing my hair-although, I really should be doing that everyday.
I must snap out of this Goodyear Couture slump. I've gone from Fashionista to Domestic Dreg. I tried making mental contracts with myself but they always fall through. And, it isn't that I'm even upset about the way I look...I'm just so focused on doing that I am not really making room for being. Truth is, I'm more bothered by the perception that I am unhappy or otherwise dissatisfied. Who in their right mind prefers heels to flip flops and jeans to jazz pants with a hole in the crotch?! I mean really. Joe reminds me that I'm "pretty all the time". Smiles, I love that guy. And, oddly enough, I'm just one of those depressed folks that is serotonin/nor-epinephrine challenged. I like myself, I think I'm smart and pretty and I love my life-when I am not plagued with fatigue, mood swings and irrational feelings of hopelessness, worry and impending doom.
No Pretty in Peace today. I made some stuff, but it's too overcast to take pics. Plus, the weekends are super slow for me. Even the fora is uninteresting today. Just as well, since I've not been particularly dulcet in demeanor of late. I got a stern admonishment from one of the Auxiliary Fora Police for "calling out"-which I didn't. And, some self-righteous idiot called me "closed-minded". (Yes, as in past-tense. Right, my mind was previously closed and now is slightly ajar). She totally misread something I wrote and of course personalised it. I wish therapists solicited clients like parishioner's. And, referral discounts or better yet, cash bonuses every time a prescription is filled. I'd be loaded. There are a bunch of fruit cakes with extra nuts in the Etsy fora and honestly, they were there even before the Gift Guides. Laughs. I made the guide, peers over each shoulder covertly and whispers "Twice-but don't tell anyone okay? Pinkie promise?Okay, good".
Takes headache break...Well, at least that was the plan-no such luck as grooming maladroit, teenage son needs 2 cornrows...and then of course I have to wash all 18 inches of ethnic evil that is Yael's hair in between bellowing at "Rogue kitten" who is attacking ghosts on top of the dining room table! Big, "No no". I'm all about singing, dancing, kissing and loving the fur kids-but the table deal is not the way to go. So now, I sit eating the ever nutritious giant bowl of corn and leftover vegetable herb stuffing head-ache free but not at all rested. Oh, and did I mention the brief oral surgery performed on a rotting cracked pre-molar? Well that too. She's now writing a letter to the Tooth Fairy. I have her convinced that the Tooth Fairy does not pay for damaged teeth. You do recall the meltdown that ensued after the last tooth was misplaced? She's obviously concerned about the impending appraisal. I think if we really low-ball her, she'll consider revising her current Jeff-Goldblum-as-The Fly-esque eating habits. Nothing else seems to work. She just asked me if she could have a piece of candy-it hasn't been an hour since the tooth was pulled. I think she's crazy. Look at that another one. I'm telling you, recruiting Louie's seems like a lucrative career choice; Tameka, Headcase Hunter LLC. It has a nice ring to it.
Louie-noun; shortened version of "Screwy Louie".

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