Tuesday, March 18, 2008

It's Tuesday, I'm a sexist nice to meet you...

Topic: Premature Ejaculation!

Buddy says: For those of you who care and have been following my story, it happened again last night...I'm *so*pissed!

Dude says: (((sportsman like pats on the ass))) I have no advice for you...I'm sending you longer harder hang time vibes from Oklahoma!

Bro says: OMG Buddy! That sucks. What did Missy say?

Buddy says: She's angry and I think she is gonna leave me. I just wish she would stop being so mean and try to understand that this is a very real problem...I can't help it.

Paisan says: It *is* real. My cousin Pal was going through the same thing and his wife stood by him so you need to tell Missy to stop being such a bitch! Pfffft! She has some hard nipples on her. If she continues just put her out. You do not need her.

Primo says: (((((((Harder more caring sportsman like pats on the ass))))))) I think someone on here makes a cream for that...*goes to check for link*

Buddy says: Yeah I think I heard that before, if you find it convo me. I don't want everyone to know who I purchased it from.

Bro says: WJW...what a bitch!

Fella says: You think you have it bad I used to have ED and, then I got some Viva Viagra and thought okay that's the end

Not! On top of the ED I too have premature ejaculation. What the hell am I going to do?! I have 3 kids how do I tell them I can't do *it*...this is horrible.

Primo says: I convo'd you :) Hi Fella...oh man so you *do* have it...I'll be lighting a torch (((sends hard wangadang and frankie says relax energies to Fella)))

Big Guy says: If she is going to leave you for that she never loved you in the first place, sorry to say, be a man and find someone who loves you for you.

Bro says: Big Guy can you *please* be sensitive. If all you came here to do is break up other people's superficial, loveless relationships then you should really go post someplace else like Promos so you can get buried with all of the other creatures.

Primo says: Just ignore him, he's disgusting. Don't feed the troll!

Now I ask, which of these guys appeals to you? Which one can you just not wait to have beer/tea/coffee with? I'm no superhuman, but seriously why are some women so masochistic. If it isn't the, "My labor was longer than your labor", "I'm crazier than you are", "My kids are more unruly than yours", "My polyamourous transvestite lover has been cheating with my so-called ex-un-boyfriend's sister". Please shut-up. No seriously, shut the hell up! I've said it a million times and here we go again, "If you stand for nothing, you fall for everything." Why is it so difficult to ask for what you want in life, work toward it and if it doesn't happen right away, try a different strategy?

I have a small committee, but we're like an army! When one of us is down, we help uplift one another. It may not always be what you want to hear but many times it is what you need to hear. I certainly don't want them to grab a tissue and join in on the snot-fest. Playing perpetual victim is not attractive at all to either sex and it is so unhealthy. Women are definitely in the lead looks wise, but it's no accident that I'm very happily married to a clumsy, hairy, self-assured man! (I love you, Joe)

I made this necklace yesterday evening and initially I named it "He Loves Me". It's girly and delicate and pretty, just like a lady. Well, ix-nay on that by the time I was done with my first cup of coffee and a bit of fora reading. So, I changed it to, "I Loves Me" (Insert neck roll). See the three petals, "I loves me, I loves me not, I loves me"...-that's the ticket, go on girl!

I know I've ruffled a faux feather boa or two by writing this and, honestly I don't care. I know I'm not the first person to think it and hell, you have to admit the imagery of men doing the same thing was at once eye-opening and amusing. I've never quite understood the psychology between women and pain, men and pleasure. At the same age when we start worrying about weight and popularity our male counterparts are very much in love with themselves in the bathroom, under the quilt anywhere and anytime they have a chance. At the same time we're saying, "Ugh I hate you, you're so pretty". They're saying "I'm stronger than you and my meat-pop is bigger than Texas." You may not always feel tall, but stand tall for "A man can't ride your back unless it's bent"~MLK. (And that ladies, is to be taken loosely, cause you know every once in a while a ride is good for your complexion).Winks, Peace!


SterlinaSoapCo said...

Looove it. :) I always admire the things you say!!!!

Kilkennycat said...

Perfectly written! I love your new necklace, and it's title. =)

Linnea said...

I love everything about this post! Thanks for such a great read this morning!

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