My second Shadow Shot Sunday; the young tree in front of our home, in all its bare beauty.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Thursday, January 29, 2009
I opened each supply drawer and stared for a spell, you know in that way we creative types do- seeing things only we can see...
I spent the least amount of time in my fabrics stash since, well...y'know-don't make me talk about it. I'm still quite sensitive about my sewing skills...
Embellishments? That won't work until I actually make something to embellish...
Back to bed.
This went on for a few days; each day sleeping longer and later than the days' previous. Hanging out in bed, spooning with the Favorite Guy who is always just the right body temperature for snoozing. I haven't found my mojo, but I've certainly had mo' Joe time than I have in months. It puts a pleasant spin on my lack of creative output. Actually, a very pleasant spin, kinda makes me feel like dancing. Won't you join me?
The music is Sara Tavares', a young, vibrant, amazing Cape Verdean artist. Her sound is a fusion of Afro-Portuguese rhythms, her unique folk-like aesthetic and Euro-pop. The dancing: multi-generational interpretations of traditional African dance; the footwork, the hips, the smiles, the mojo. Swoon.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
I'm almost embarrassed to say that I don't. As sensitive as I am and as important as these sensitivities are to me, I somehow manage to become host to some seriously negative bugs. Perhaps, it's because I'm a listener by nature, or because I'm nurturing and empathetic or maybe I just need to learn when to say, "cover your mouth."
What, if anything has worked for you? How do you keep the bad stuff out without trapping the good stuff in?
Monday, January 26, 2009
Sunday, January 25, 2009
I've kept this picture through the years because we're weird like that! What outtakes have you kept around just for fun?
I've joined the Keri Smith inspired 100 Ideas group on Flickr. In less than a week, my participation has truly inspired me to see things differently- push the envelope if you will, dig deeper. And now, I'm passing it on to you. Photograph something, someone you see everyday in a NEW! different and exciting way.
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Friday, January 23, 2009
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Monday, January 19, 2009
Sunday, January 18, 2009
A reviewer once referred to Tea & Honey Bread as, "A Black blog where everything isn't about Blackness". That's how I see Obama's presidency. Moreover, the timing of his inauguration as it falls just days after Martin Luther King Jr.'s birthday. In the same way we cheer for the teams of our Alma maters' and hometowns'; this election is a win for the team of those who dared to pray, dream, hope and believe in change.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
This post has been sitting in my edits for nearly a week. Each time I'd try to work on it, my mind told me I wasn't ready. In the same way that it stops me from saying something (albeit only on very rare occasion) that might not be the most diplomatic thing to say.
Last Monday someone fairly close to me went into a rehabilitation center for substance abuse. Immediately the calls started coming in from eager, anticipatory family members. There was a pressing urgency for me to "get on board" with everyone else and their hysterical happiness. "Oh she went, that's good news, keep me posted", I said over and over again in a rote tone. Each time, hanging up the phone and feeling a burning anger, fueled by doubt and a selfishness necessary to survive a relationship with an addict. When she disappoints again, because she always does, let me know how all that happiness works out for ya, I thought as I stew in my own raging sea of painful memories and their corresponding emotions.
Today, I spoke with my mother for the first time in nearly 20 years. Of course I've spoken to her in between, but it wasn't her. You see it was...I don't know, pick a vice-[insert here]-speaking. We'd speak, she and I , a few times a month; verbal sparring, full of vitriol in a cycle of anger that's been part of our relationship for more years than not. Sometimes, I'd avoid it by not telling her who I was. "Hello may I speak with...", she couldn't recognize my voice. This became the system of bypassing her to check on my siblings without incident. But, today was different. I called, she answered and she knew my voice right away. She seemed almost happy to hear it; keeping in mind that recognizing the emotional state of a veritable stranger can be oft-times deceptive. It was odd, for so many years to change in so few days. It was a pleasant "visit", I guess.
It's going to be a long road ahead, for both of us. It's going to take equal parts strength, perseverance and patience to let go of her habits as it will mine, and I can't expect her to be anymore understanding of my defenses than I am of her dependencies. I didn't come to this hardened place easily and I don't believe the soul-kneading process of softening my heart to be a fundamental task. But, I'm here today admitting it, and as I've come to learn, "admitting is the first step". "Hi my name is Tameka and I'm the hurt, angry adult child of an addict. Deep breath.
Peace and Strength
Friday, January 16, 2009
Old picture, same story
Challenge blogs are plentiful throughout the blogosphere, it's just a matter of finding the right fit. They can be the push you need to get past a creative block every now and then. Work Your Soul's first challenge prompt of the new year is up now. What can I do with a Victorian theme? Your guess is as good as mine, but I plan to put some (and my) soul into it. Winks. We'll see just what I-and the others, come up with some time between now and the 30th of January. If any of you are interested, stop by and see how many ways you can Work Your Soul.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
It seems a Washington teacher, Matthew Hirschfelder appealed his first degree sexual misconduct with a minor charge and won. Hirschfelder challenged the charge citing the young woman- an 18 year old choir student of his, was 18 and therefore not a minor at the time the alleged (she says yuppers, he says uh-uhn) sexual misconduct [relationship] occurred.
Skeptics say this is unconstitutional; if 18 is the age of consent you can't criminally charge teachers for violating ethics. Those in favor believe it sends a strong zero tolerance message. It also protects developmentally delayed students who are often in attendance at public high schools until age 21. I say, had Missy Mischief Pants spent more time in, oh...say math class she'd have known that Mister Slimy Singing Teacher Dude had 1 wife and 3, THREE, tres, trois children with another on the way. (Must be all of those damn breaks and summers off.) This leaves ol' Matt-Daddy with approximately 36% (per WA State child support calculator) of his music teacher's salary; not exactly going to put her up in a castle on a hill-not even if he snagged one at a foreclosure auction. 36% of a music teacher's salary is lunch money!
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
There has been an influx in duck-lipped (grossly exaggerated pouting) eyes-rolling, foot stomping, hyperventilating tween girl in a tizzy antics 'round these parts. And the worst part is, "nothing is wrong". "What's wrong?" Mumbles, "nothing". "Well why do you look like that?" "Like what", as the first eye roll is delivered. "Like this". I put on my thespian mom hat and engage in a brief game of charades. Whining ensues, as she says something unintelligible followed by "Nothingggggggggggggggggggggggggggg". Lips begin to stretch, eyes roll and roll and rolllllllllll, she rocks back in the seat to gain momentum as she rises to full erectness and stomps her flat little fresh-mouthed girl feet across my floor (when I'm annoyed I become unnecessarily territorial, other examples include but are not limited to; "You had better clean my damn kitchen") and into her CLOSET-also known as "Oh-my-god- I-really-hate-her-camp".
So, I bought these books by Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein today. One is for me and the other is for us-after all, we're in this thing together, she and I. I used what would have been my new Moo cards money, I figure promotional materials aren't practical in the penitentiary; first things first. I'll let you know how it goes. At least I have another night of American Idol auditions to chortle over and glazed donuts. Winks.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Today, all four of my Bic Atlantis super smooth comfort grip retractable black medium ball point pens were missing amidst the Mercado abyss. And as usual, I was met with raised brows, Scooby faces and silent prayers of invisibility as I launched into a near tear-filled rage. Where are my pens, I have shit to do!
Fast forward through my phone rant, a piece of heavily iced coconut cake, my third glass of Diet Coke-following a week-long Diet Coke detox and, a nap. Favorite Guy takes me to the Mega Lo Mart to purchase not one, but two packs of my perfect pens and a Whatchamacallit. I'm in histrionic housewife heaven! And for good reason, I have a pen pal.
Not since the grammar school foreign language pen pal program have I had a pen-pal, and now I do. Even better, is you can too. Awesome Etsian and zinester, Patti of No Somos Nada Zines is conducting an upcoming zine project using letters from various pen pals. How cool is that? I found out about the project and alerted her of my interest after purchasing my second zine in her "Who is This Woman?" series. I received my first letter last week and can't wait to write her back with my contribution to the project!
When is the last time you sent or received a handwritten letter, just for fun? If you are interested in this project you can reach Patti via Etsy convo.
Peace and the perfect pen
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Okay, Cool Kids, as I mentioned last week; I am perversely intrigued by American Idol and have been since season one. I watch, I comment, I judge, I vote and, I threaten to stop watching every time someone I kinda, sorta worship gets eliminated. Admission is the first step.
So, without further ado, here is what I'd wear to my audition had I been a decade younger, and $300 richer: Earrings; Pretty in Peace- Dress; Dear Delight - Boots; Enzo Angiolini
And, this is what I'd sing If I was half the chanteuse I think I am after a 6-pack of the fine lager whilst strutting my kinda-flabby-work-in-progress-mom-stuff across the kitchen floor. (Alice Smith is all about it, and he's cute in my "artist-dude-groupie-way", so ignore the poorly timed recording and just listen, mmkay?)
And Simon Cowell, the stallion that he is- after a case of the fine lager, whilst strutting my kinda-flabby-work-in-progress-mom-stuff across the kitchen floor, would send me to Hollywood; after a few sips of whatever that happy ass Paula Abdul is having!
Now, I know some of you are shy, but bring it. It's my party and everybody is going to Hollywood! Who cares if we're waiting tables. Winks.
Shutter Click & Chat 1/18: A Piece of Your American Pie
Next week, 1/18: I think we need to take this party to the Inaugural Ball-Show me a piece of your America. I'll take the good, the bad and the ugly. Hmm...
Friday, January 9, 2009
When my day begins, if nothing else I know-almost intrinsically, I will produce something creative; a new jewelry design, a doodle, a blog post, a meal-something! When I choose not to, it's almost always "the taupes" and, even then, I can spend innumerable hours internally philosophising and engaging in silent rhetoric about my complex, depressed mind. But, when I cannot create, I am not well. It's a guttural cry with no sound; it's the psyche censured.
I've been fortunate; dabbling in different media usually guarantees the production of something, but recently that's changed. After the Crafeteria III craft your fingers off jewelry design binge, I packed my beads and wire away. Then, the holiday hoopla bust your gut bake-athon, put the kibosh on cooking. A card-making swap was the paper crafts party pooper, zine production is underway, but not quite ready for praise and presentation...heart starts racing, palms begin to sweat. What's a crafty maven to do?
I tried to clean and rearrange my workspace...um, not. I moved a few things around, started toying with my tchatchkes and before you know it, I was in the yard taking the photos in this post.
When my day begins, if nothing else, I know-almost intrinsically, I will produce something creative! Photos: Carved wooden hands-a gift to myself for doing my first craft fair. Vintage "T" printing blocks-a gift to myself for my 300th blog post. Resin typewriter-Dollar Tree goodness.
What new techniques, ideas and inspiration have you discovered amidst a creative block fail?
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
So, I've been doing lots of shtuff (happy medium):
Designing jewelry for my Etsy shop and consignment; love is in the air with Valentine's Day just around the corner. I'm also teaching biology, more specifically I am teaching orgasms and simulust. This is 9 year old-ese for organisms and stimulus, but the former is pretty funny. Isn't it? Ponders all sorts of dirty jokes around those two words. The Favorite Guy and I have given up our former lives of leisure (read: laziness) and returned to the gym. Guess whose mat was closest to the farting yogi? I had to break my zen for a moment of road kill thoughts to keep me from bursting into childlike hysterics. Yes, flatulence is funny. "Whatevs Grandma, I'm mature in other ways, it all balances out". And lastly, I've been missing all of you-so I'll be back soon with pictures of all of the shit I've been doing. I'm documenting it for proof of martyrdom...er, I mean blog fodder. Winks.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
I really had no right to cry boredom since my workspace is chaotic, my lesson plans are incomplete, my abs need tightening, legs need shaving, hair needs conditioning; nonetheless, I had nothing to do. So, I did nothing. And, now it's Tuesday and I'm playing catch up! Unbelievable! I need a beer. By the way, The Buzz blog is buzzing with creative freshness, have a look!
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Me. In the morning. In my usual Anemic Mom Couture: a hoodie and pajamas. (and of course, Naturally Natalie's vegan peppermint lip balm)
Next week...no judgements please! See, American Idol is one of my few guilty pleasures and the season begins on the 13th. So, I was kinda thinking we should all go virtual shopping for our audition outfits and the song that will send us to Hollywood. Oh stop, you know you love, love, love it!
Shutter Click & Chat 1/11: Hollywood Baby! And don't forget your theme song. Who's in?
Friday, January 2, 2009
There is an undeniably inviting feeling about all things second except of course, being second best. Although, on second thought I'm feeling-amidst all of this second day serenity, if my personal best is second best then it's still first place for me.
Happy not quite so new year everybody. I hope there's a peaceful calm surrounding you as you make your way through the trials and triumphs of another year.