Thursday, March 20, 2008

I've been tagged!

Tagged?! Me?! Have you ever?! I'm pretty excited about it too, it's been years...decades even. Only this time I'm not running about, panting heavily, on the verge of tears as I'm taunted by the kid with Kenyan marathoner speed! This is a pleasant change if I may say so.
I'm a little nervous, well-I'm always nervous, I probably should detox caffeine, but then I'd be angry. Anyway..Nina called me, "Fascinating." Truth is I of course don't find myself all that fascinating so it was tough to come up with little tidbits that would remain consistent with the prestige of fascination and not increase my daughter's dowry in the process. She really is a lovely girl despite what you read about me.

The rules of Tagging are as follows:
1. Link to the person that tagged you.
2. Post the rules on your blog.
3. Share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself.
4. Tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs.
5. Let each random person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their website
Any questions? Alright here we go...

I feel like David Letterman doing this...

1. I am the oldest of 3-by a whopping 15 years, and the shortest by nearly as many inches (5'3).

2. I am a Pitta/Vata dosha type. So, basically I'm athletic and angry with stomach problems.

3. I'm painfully introverted and very much a homebody. If I venture out of the house once a week, that is enough for me.

4. I have a fashion sense that can and is only described as "Tameka/Meka". see shoes pics.

5. I can NOT sit on the left side of any room, theatre, restaurant, etc.

6. I've voted for American Idol every year since its inception but, I identify myself politically as a philosophical anarchist.

And there you have it ladies and gentlemen! Throws cards on the floor a la Mr. Letterman, the crowd roars and the band plays us out to commercial...
Your turn...
1. -I chose Spaz to draw some traffic to her new blog. Welcome!
2. -BrightCircle is a friendly Etsy fora regular who appreciates my use of the word, "Fluffy."
3. chose Boho after swooning over her Decorating on a Dime before and after shots.
4. -Ryan reads my carp and has the cutest cat!
5. Fellow Etsian and fora funnies buddy
6. NEW! Etsian with wonderful wares. Welcome!

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Okay, so perhaps I am over-protective...a little teeny bit. This evening I booked a flight for Puberty Man. He is headed for the Big Apple. My sweet' um's, my honey bunches of oats with almonds...the fruit of my way young, oh so taught and perky lady loins. Wink. What shall I do? Seriously, a whole week! Yikes! Joe is being totally testosterone-filled about the whole thing, but between you, me and the world wide webs the depths of his Cancerian lunacy is as bad as mine. 3,000 miles in less than 30 days... half of my chromosomes are outta here. I'm a mess Margaret! Make no mistake, beneath my polished exterior and eloquence, I am a mad medley of "New York yenta, Low Country martyr and, good ol' I-read-the-paper-and-know-all-about-crazy-ass-folks, high on too much coffee" mom. Deep breath. If you thought otherwise...that's fine forget what I just said and mind your business.

As the children get older and this parenting deal spans beyond tattling and tooth fairies I am forced to recognize just how tough it really is. I'm a bit of...well okay I am a total control freak. I'm very open-minded about some things but there are areas of my children's lives that I am near tyrannical about. I guess we all have things that are important to us based on our own upbringing and experiences...I'd say I have fewer than most but the few that I have, I'm rather fervent about.

Sex-Anyone who thinks the power of pulsating pantie parts is squelched by a stern talking to is nuts. The way I see it is, if you're going to do it please protect yourself because you don't want a lifelong case of cooties or a kid before you've even mastered your technique. I often joke with the committee about how many years of bad sex of we've all partaken in. Why is flexibility and stamina wasted on youth?! It's some kind of cruel joke to be able to stay awake for hours on end bumping about awkwardly and by the time you really figure it all out-you've either no time or shit stops working properly. Have at it while you can.

Drugs-I don't understand the appeal of drugs. And, on a more serious note they have had a larger more painful impact on my life than many, well...than most. That being said this is a HUGE issue for me. I've had the drug talk, and I don't subscribe to the whole, "Marijuana is a gateway drug blah blah... I started with pot and now I sniff glue with what's left of my nose after coke". Not. But, realistically speaking I advise against marijuana and other drug use because it makes you ugly and you forget shit. Trust if I have to remind Puberty Man to do the same chores he's been doing for the past 4 years on the same days each week everyday, he probably would forget to breathe if he took up pot smoking. So, I think we've pretty much covered that. And as for looks he's fairly vain from years of hearing how carefully one must select a mate to ensure the integrity of the gene pool. Yes, I'm serious.

Education-I homeschool for a number of reasons, but running really close behind the fact that I love spending time with my little people is that I want them to leave and not come back. They are welcome to stay with Joe and I as long as they are pursuing an education which will inevitably lead to a career, financial independence and alas their departure. I cannot depend on the state of Arizona to ensure that I will one day be able to traipse around in the buff again or go on a vacation that does not require that I actually do anything. I am fine with booking a flight to a far off land to eat food that I cannot get locally, sleep and read. That, after all is a vacation. Trudging the hot crowded hills of an amusement park only to end my day with burning feet and gas courtesy of Panda Express is a fate worse than death.

That's pretty much it, I'm pretty easy, huh? I don't stress over fashion or asshole friends. Some of my best times were spent living vicariously through the experiences of an asshole friend(s). And once they're in heat the middle school hygiene issues have since rectified themselves. I mean, while you're in the bathroom lip syncing, posing in the mirror and pulling on your parts you may as well take advantage of the amenities and splash a little water on it, no?

I guess in reviewing some of the policies and procedures I'm feeling a bit more comfortable about the whole idea. He'll be with family and friends and it is only 7 days. Shudder. I'll have to do something to help the time go quickly...If you have any suggestions, please drop a line. If I go with your suggestion, I'll chronicle the adventure right here and I'll send you a Pretty in Peace design for being cool, deal? What I will not do is anything that will require me to leave my house or limit carbohydrate intake...anything else is fair game. Start your engines.

It's Tuesday, I'm a sexist nice to meet you...

Topic: Premature Ejaculation!

Buddy says: For those of you who care and have been following my story, it happened again last night...I'm *so*pissed!

Dude says: (((sportsman like pats on the ass))) I have no advice for you...I'm sending you longer harder hang time vibes from Oklahoma!

Bro says: OMG Buddy! That sucks. What did Missy say?

Buddy says: She's angry and I think she is gonna leave me. I just wish she would stop being so mean and try to understand that this is a very real problem...I can't help it.

Paisan says: It *is* real. My cousin Pal was going through the same thing and his wife stood by him so you need to tell Missy to stop being such a bitch! Pfffft! She has some hard nipples on her. If she continues just put her out. You do not need her.

Primo says: (((((((Harder more caring sportsman like pats on the ass))))))) I think someone on here makes a cream for that...*goes to check for link*

Buddy says: Yeah I think I heard that before, if you find it convo me. I don't want everyone to know who I purchased it from.

Bro says: WJW...what a bitch!

Fella says: You think you have it bad I used to have ED and, then I got some Viva Viagra and thought okay that's the end

Not! On top of the ED I too have premature ejaculation. What the hell am I going to do?! I have 3 kids how do I tell them I can't do *it*...this is horrible.

Primo says: I convo'd you :) Hi Fella...oh man so you *do* have it...I'll be lighting a torch (((sends hard wangadang and frankie says relax energies to Fella)))

Big Guy says: If she is going to leave you for that she never loved you in the first place, sorry to say, be a man and find someone who loves you for you.

Bro says: Big Guy can you *please* be sensitive. If all you came here to do is break up other people's superficial, loveless relationships then you should really go post someplace else like Promos so you can get buried with all of the other creatures.

Primo says: Just ignore him, he's disgusting. Don't feed the troll!

Now I ask, which of these guys appeals to you? Which one can you just not wait to have beer/tea/coffee with? I'm no superhuman, but seriously why are some women so masochistic. If it isn't the, "My labor was longer than your labor", "I'm crazier than you are", "My kids are more unruly than yours", "My polyamourous transvestite lover has been cheating with my so-called ex-un-boyfriend's sister". Please shut-up. No seriously, shut the hell up! I've said it a million times and here we go again, "If you stand for nothing, you fall for everything." Why is it so difficult to ask for what you want in life, work toward it and if it doesn't happen right away, try a different strategy?

I have a small committee, but we're like an army! When one of us is down, we help uplift one another. It may not always be what you want to hear but many times it is what you need to hear. I certainly don't want them to grab a tissue and join in on the snot-fest. Playing perpetual victim is not attractive at all to either sex and it is so unhealthy. Women are definitely in the lead looks wise, but it's no accident that I'm very happily married to a clumsy, hairy, self-assured man! (I love you, Joe)

I made this necklace yesterday evening and initially I named it "He Loves Me". It's girly and delicate and pretty, just like a lady. Well, ix-nay on that by the time I was done with my first cup of coffee and a bit of fora reading. So, I changed it to, "I Loves Me" (Insert neck roll). See the three petals, "I loves me, I loves me not, I loves me"...-that's the ticket, go on girl!

I know I've ruffled a faux feather boa or two by writing this and, honestly I don't care. I know I'm not the first person to think it and hell, you have to admit the imagery of men doing the same thing was at once eye-opening and amusing. I've never quite understood the psychology between women and pain, men and pleasure. At the same age when we start worrying about weight and popularity our male counterparts are very much in love with themselves in the bathroom, under the quilt anywhere and anytime they have a chance. At the same time we're saying, "Ugh I hate you, you're so pretty". They're saying "I'm stronger than you and my meat-pop is bigger than Texas." You may not always feel tall, but stand tall for "A man can't ride your back unless it's bent"~MLK. (And that ladies, is to be taken loosely, cause you know every once in a while a ride is good for your complexion).Winks, Peace!

Monday, March 17, 2008


Be nice. Have empathy. That is rude. Is that really necessary? Be sensitive. You are being negative.That is not PC. Persecution.Communism. Oppression. Racism. Fascism. Priapism! Give me a fucking break already will you?!
Truth be told, I am very sensitive on the giving and receiving ends. I am also enlightened progressive and culturally aware in so far as to not willfully malign any one's character, race creed or other lifestyle, gender, religious preferences. I am also a writer. I live for words and the feelings they elicit. "I have the plague." I do not "feel ill". "It is hotter than Africa". It isn't just, "rather warm". I send people to "Hell" without questioning their religious affiliations. I say "You're a fucking moron!"-without first testing IQ. And, yes! You can be a fucking moron and Mensa as far as I'm concerned-whilst painting a mental picture, sculpting a story, taking a snapshot of life in words.(With all due respect to 98th percentile)

The pleasure and plight of the right-brained thinker is in the nuances of everything we encounter, everything we dream, think, extrapolate-is heightened and magnified so that every minute piece of meaning, affect, taste, smell, color is gleaned. It is difficult to understand the way others view the world even other Right-siders, because like art and feelings it all boils down to perception. Your perception is the only reality.

I design jewelry, and I've been quite successful. Ironically enough, I do not wear jewelry. When designing a piece, I paint a mental picture of the wearer and I design for them. Every piece that I make has a buyer in mind. Does that make me prejudiced, of course it does. Is it also stereotyping that a specific piece of jewelry would be worn be a select group of people? Yup, sure is. Is that a bad thing, only if you perceive it so. My intent is to hone in on personal style and whether we choose to accept it or not removing any and all prejudice from the human brain is an impossibility. It is designed to categorize everything. Way before you even think it, there are cells working to select, sort, batch and box all of the info in your bucket. If you are not grouping images, thoughts and ideas, please see a mental health practitioner pronto!

So, Tameka what the hell are you talking about really? I'm saying Ack!, Lighten up. Take a chill pill (Great now I've pissed off all of my fellow antidepressant dependant cronies. But I'm sure the pharmaceuticals industry welcomes the plug-so we're even.) Stop the perpetual activism and just let people live. All of this censorship is so very stifling and uncreative. You can't please everyone all of the time, and trying to really annoys the shit out of me. (No offense to anyone suffering from incontinence or other intestinal disorders). Shut up and stand up people!(Use of the phrase, "stand up" is a metaphor for assertion. I am in no way singling out those who are unable to stand for health/medical/religious/random reasons.) You alone give power to meaninglessness when you assign a powerful meaning. Don't drink the Kool-Aid! (No offense to the makers employees, drinkers of Kool-Aid brand products and their affiliates.) Thank you.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

ACEOs IV: Amnesia and Anju

This is Anju. I am in love with this kitten. Truly, of all the pets that I've had Anju is the best. He is still kinda awkward and definitely overweight, but aren't all of the lovable ones?
I began collecting ACEOs at the beginning of the year. They are a way to build an art collection that speaks of all of my varied styles and interests without going broke. I presently buy all of my ACEOs from Etsy where I sell my jewelry.
This piece Amnesia, by community member Jennifer Mulcahy is my tribute to "Fats, the Lovecat" or Anju as the masses know him. It is a brilliant photo montage. Please see her other uber-creative works in her Etsy shop,

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

I am back.

Every so often I need to retreat, relax and regroup before I take another step on the path of life. I haven't been totally idle, I've managed to piss a few people off, design some new pieces of jewelry for Pretty in Peace and begin some home projects.
As for pissing people off...I don't know what is so annoying, intimidating, threatening or irksome about the musings of an intelligent black woman, but let me just tell you how feathers get quite a-fluff 'round the interwebs when I make sense. Apparently it isn't what you know or who you know for that matter, but who it is that knows. Gotta love this country, yes?

Pretty in Peace is doing remarkably well, the recession hasn't hurt me, really. Of course it isn't like I'm selling blood diamonds or cars so it shouldn't, but the propaganda has folks preparing for something just shy of the Apocalypse. I've spent my entire existence in a recession, so I don't see myself making any drastic cuts to the budget. That being said continue to stop in and peruse. There are new delights almost daily!
On the home front, yellow...yes yellow. I am redoing the dining area in yellow. Reupholstering the chairs, replacing the decorative plates and table linens to correspond with yellow! Yellow reminds me of tutoring my little brother and his insistence that yellow was spelled Jello? I guess that was the thought process...Damn you Bill Cosby! I am proud to say that he is all grown-up and Bill has failed to hinder his lot in life. I'm not sure why I chose yellow when most of the house is muted hues of blues and greens with wood accents and a world art motif, but I'm up for the challenge! Stay tuned for pictures.

Saturday, March 1, 2008

For John...

I was gifted a book, The Prophet byKhalil Gibran- 20 years ago that has really been the answer to all of my heart's questions since that day...please read this excerpt, and hold it in your heart for John Ziemblicki.
I have highlighted special parts. I love you all. Let us be one and strong, let us hope our grief will bring us peace and understanding. From across many miles, I pass my gift on to you....

On Friendship- Kahlil Gibran
Your friend is your needs answered.He is your field which you sow with love and reap with thanksgiving.And he is your board and your fireside.For you come to him with your hunger, and you seek him for peace.When your friend speaks his mind you fear not the "nay" in your own mind, nor do you withhold the "ay."
And when he is silent your heart ceases not to listen to his heart;For without words, in friendship, all thoughts, all desires, all expectations are born and shared, with joy that is unacclaimed.
When you part from your friend, you grieve not;For that which you love most in him may be clearer in his absence, as the mountain to the climber is clearer from the plain.And let there be no purpose in friendship save the deepening of the spirit.For love that seeks aught but the disclosure of its own mystery is not love but a net cast forth: and only the unprofitable is caught.And let your best be for your friend.If he must know the ebb of your tide, let him know its flood also.For what is your friend that you should seek him with hours to kill?Seek him always with hours to live.For it is his to fill your need, but not your emptiness.And in the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures.For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed.
In love and light,

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